I handed in a term paper and finished a presentation this week. Just one more proposal to go before weekend beckons! =)

It is very odd that I cannot remember what I said at all during the presentation, because my mind was in an incomprehensible flustered blank, but I think writing a presentation transcript helped a lot. My groupmates said I sounded nice and friendly, which I suppose is a good thing, because I was only reading straight off my notes in blind auto-pilot.

Which means that the extra effort that goes into preparing a separate informal script written in second-person "do you see the link now?" "if you would hold that thought for a minute... lemme show you the next bit..." "now, so how do we do this?" actually works for the flustered mind that was quite spaced out in anxiety =) spent the hour-long bus trip to school with the notes before me talking away under my breath, occassionally pausing and quirking an eyebrow and tilting my head to stare quizzically at the paper, but amazingly no one gave me weird looks. Ah well.

That aside, there is this guy in my class that looks uncannily like another friend of mine. I get a jolt of surprise every time I look at him, especially when he's got this exact same expression that my other friend always wears. And no, they don't have the same surnames, and are immensely different in how they talk, but... *shudder* It's freaky lar, can, and he's in three of my modules, so on days when my mind is in a decidedly dramatic mode I'll be reminded of gothic Doubles and Uncanny reflections and mirrored Selfs.

Very weird.

Okay, must not get carried away. Had a field day analysing female insanity and madness, logic, il-logic and a-logic, and irreducible Otherness and the Elsewhere outside patriarchal discourse during seminar today. It is very scary to have extremely vocal, eloquent and cheemified people in your class, a good percentage of whom you see on Dean's List.

I concluded that I am no dramatic passionate fighter against existing systems, nor aspiring abolisher of the established status-quo, so literary discourse is a... kinda enjoyable vicarious dramatisation of what I would not get to do in reality =) I am honestly quite a content creature of systems and habits (sad as it sounds... wah lao, then be arts student and question so much for what, right?) probably because I have never really had stuff imposed upon me (read: I usually get what I want, without even having to ask for them ^_^)--so I very seldom demand for radical changes in anything. While I can't find the heart to condemn alternative preferences and am generally sympathetic towards the marginalised, I am, I regret to say, no activist either... not quite in me to conduct riots for liberation of the repressed soul and rally for change. Yes, darn, I'm such a passive creature. How unexciting.

Okay, random rant over, back to formulating a new set of cheem arguments for my Body module.