You know, things are making a lot more sense now, somehow.

*sigh* How important it is to listen, to feel, to ask the right questions, and then, with that sudden dawning of realisation and relief, find that you're not alone in feeling the same way.

For all the fondness I have in putting thoughts into words, sometimes even what I feel lie just beyond my boundaries of perception.

Is it better to lose your temper outright, I wonder, than to retreat into a glowering simmering silence, where the meaning of your own anger is lost upon you? It's a bad habit I know, but I'm so not used to articulating my feelings, that when I'm pissed off I'd withdraw into stony silence, because I've been brought up with years of tested and proven testimonies that I never win arguments, so it is wise to not start arguments, and not to continue one that's threatening to start. Blah.

And the second annoying realisation, of course, is that everytime I get irritated with someone, I will, quite naturally, put the blame on myself first, instead. Which doesn't really solve the problem, now to come to think of it. Maybe sometimes it isn't my fault for wanting to glower and snap at someone, and maybe I don't have to hold back.

So much for spontaneity Charm. And with your flare of annoyance rudely shoved away and dismissed as such, the source of the problem becomes obscured, totally, and you're left wondering why the heck things seem so wrong, but you cannot put your finger on anything. How silly.

Thank goodness for friends who are human enough to flare up once in a while, so that I can determine that I'm not being unnecessarily sensitive, or something. =)

I think, people,
that maybe some mutual respect is wanting,
that sometimes it pays to hush, listen, and learn.

National A Cappella Championships 06

We won we won we won we won we won!!!

AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! *Hugs OOPs* Am so very very proud of you guys, and am so proud to BE part of you guys :) Every moment that went into this... the effort, the pains, the agonizing, the doubts, the fears... the laughter, the friendships, the teasing, the determination, the confiding in one another...

I think of the tempers and the terse sullen silences, and the angsty blog entries, the "I-can't-do-it-anymore" despair, the moments of "I know I'm wrong, I'm trying already, okay?" and the struggling with the notes over and over to get them right, and tumbling back to square one again at the next prac, and the stage fright, and the fear that we can't be as zai as our seniors and, so often, that lack of polished confidence *sigh* so many things, my dear OOPs, but I'm so glad we pulled through, together, in one piece, as a group. :)

I am glad, so glad for this competition, for without the pressure and the stress and the extended periods of practice, we wouldn't have pushed ourselves this far, known one another and ourselves better, and felt, from that one glorious moment when they announced the results onwards, that acknowledgement that we do have what it takes, that-- hey guys -- maybe it's time to believe we really can do it :)

And I haven't forgotten the little stuff that keep us going... My deepest gratitude to my singing-mates: Cheryl and her concerned nagging and her insidious SDLA activities with Amanda :P and her constant driving us on, yes dear, even the tantrums that kept us on our toes, and let us know deep within how much OOPs mean to you... Wai Lun and his "oh man" and multiple hand gestures and odd terms... *does swirly hand actions for "give-wayness", "gen-tle, gen-tle" and "bleeend, bleend" and -more hand-wringing actions- "you must do this, trust me!"* Yes, we do trust you :) You're a great music director, man... Then we have Jeremy, our precious OOPian source of energy and high-ness, for still making it despite losing your voice, and winning over screaming fangirls in the crowd *grins* even more than Wai Lun this time! haha (and oi, you're still a crucial part of us okay, so don't you dare think otherwise :) )... Derek, our precious pillar of support, for always being there, so much so that we sometimes take you for granted, for being a wonderful listener, and for the unintentionally scandalous classics that have us rolling over with laughter ("Guys look good wearing nothing!"), adding that out-of-pointness true to the OOPian tradition :) And Amanda, Cheryl's formidable partner-in-SDLA, super efficient shopper, multi-tasker, designer, 'manliest girl' *grins* and a great friend on top of it all, and the long bus rides and her long deep contemplations and uncanny sense for er-hrm... information :)

None of this would have been possible with the rest of Reso by our side too, and support from friends who came to watch :) It's heartwarming and so reassuring to have you all down, Reso-peeps, from Edmund and Davina, who've been there since sound check and several practices before that, to Voco and Equi and VnH for being such key inspirations, to RFYs, for letting us know that all these can and will go on, to every Reso-mate for cheering and screaming and taking pictures and video and giving advice and doing vigourous waving of hands in the audience (well, this one is mainly Davina lar =P) and boosting our confidence...

This is all quite a mouthful, but you guys have done so much, I cannot thank you all enough. The trophy belongs to each and every one of you who've been there to share it all with us :)

I'm getting carried away with sentimental dedications. Okay, back to the competition, now. Photos, anyone?


The Charlie's-Angels pose *laughs* Sorry, we look so bling bling with the white and gold, we really couldn't resist =P Amanda Cheryl and Charm take over Esplanade!


Our guys look good too :) No, I'm not posting up the other one with Derek's pseudo-Cheryl pose because I find it quite... disturbing -_-''

Reso Onstage (Thanks Lyndley and Wai Lun's friend for the pics!)















If I Ain't Got You















*cue haunting music as Cheryl is left looking alone and depressed in a corner*






















Bring Me to Life















Competition was stiff for the college category this year, with a total of 8 participating groups, a number of which proved to be really good. Didn't remember much from the whirlwind of movements and emotions that went on that day, but Sheares and KR were impressive in their tight blend and harmony, and so was Tone, who looked on the whole pretty comfortable with one another onstage, with the added liveliness of choreography, too. Makes you realise how much staging and visuals play in the judging criteria, as well.

I think OOPs did a lot better onstage this time, as compared to then at VOii :) Balance was better, and the energy was there, thank goodness... And whichever universe we travelled to, we travelled together this time *smiles* Was freaked out at the sound check because the volume was so much lower, and the rest were going "you'll have to make do with yelling into the mike then, Charm. Remember, sing super loud, okay?"... They raised the overall volume for all groups for the actual thing, though *exudes relief* Oh and judging from the photos we didn't look as nervous as we felt *grins* Felt the nervous energy ebb off gradually halfway through If I Ain't, probably cos we had the luxury of drawing comfort from the presence of the rest of Reso, and cos the relatively neutral expressions (and frowns!) of the judges melted into genuine smiles at the end of each song =) And Bring Me was, as always, absolutely exhilarating to perform, after the alarming sensation of pitch-and-placement shift at the beginning that settled after a bit. Loved the screams that accompanied Cheryl's solo for If I Ain't and Jeremy's part for Bring Me, haha...

On to the open category... Equivox is super zai :) Loved Nan Ping the most out to the three... Agua felt a little different from the relaxed feel I'm kinda used to, but Equi has a generally different overall style from Voco, so that's probably why... Miss Independant's volume felt a bit... muted? but was, as always, very impressive ^_^ Was super high bouncing along and humming and screaming for Equi "in different pitches and styles", as Hua Hui advised us to do *grins*




Karen whips her scarf out of nowhere as the men act macho =P
























LADA was a strong competitor as well, with their high energy and volume and stage presence. What kinda struck me was how full their background sounded, yet a lot of the energy seems to rest on the soloist alone, more than anything else. They got the crowd a-buzzing, though, which was when I began to worry for Equi...

The super nerve-wrecking moment of the night was the announcing of the results, of course... even more so than the actual performance itself. I was worried for us, and for Equi, too... and every five minute delay, every extra JuzB song "eh? sing again? ah, the judges are not ready yet..." seemed like eons, can...
















(As a side note, Juz B is pretty cool, but I wasn't quite in the mood to pay attention)


Best soloist 2006, from Vibr8




















Best Vocal Percussionist 2006, Hua Hui from Equi! *wild cheering*




















Equivox won the recording contract, too, for Nan Ping Wan Zhong *more cheers*

It's delightful to stand huddled in a group by the stage, screaming like mad each time your fellow Reso-group wins something :) We had a lot of extra group hugs that night, courtesy of Wai Lun =)

They announced all consolation prizes first, and it was by a gradual process of elimination before the dramatic pause for the first and second prizes. TAG won the secondary school category... caught a bit of their performance, which was quite upbeat and lively... Not a surprise there :) Congratulations, Tag~

And then the open category. When they announced Lada second there was a pause before it sank in full, and then we were screaming and jumping like crazy... Equivox swept the championships! Along with the recording contract and best vocal percussionist! *squeals in delight* It's so heartwarming to see Huahui spin Serene around in exhilaration as the rest of Equi came onstage, an initially super kan cheong Simon along with them, all alive with delight, taking their place in the line-up of other winners onstage.

Then of course, the college category. It was startling to hear them announce KR and Sheares amongst the first of the consolation prizes, because they were genuinely good... And it's one group after another, some that I knew of, others that I didn't catch... leaving, noticeably, Resonance and Tone in the remaining top two positions.

Oh, the suspense.

They announced Tone in the second place, and there we had our second round of mad, mad screaming and bouncing and cheering and... oh, it was crazy, but it felt so good =) The relief, the exhilaration, the everything. The significance of this win wasn't in proving anything to the world, but, rather, in the much-needed assurance for OOPs, in everything we've learnt together, and in sharing this big big present with the rest of Resonance, who've made it all possible... Against such worthy competitors, too. *salutes fellow competitors*

And then Cheryl was pushed forward to receive the trophy, and the rest was lost in the flurry of hugs as OOPs met Equi onstage =)






I like this picture =)




National Champions. Oh man, I'm still reeling from the thrill of it all.



Did an OOPs collage, for memory's sake :)









If I Ain't Got You-all, none of these would have been possible =)












Equivox not only sounds good, they look good, too ;)
















Long live Resonance, and long live a cappella! =)

Resonance A Cappella is performing at the National A Cappella Championships this Thursday, 20th June, Esplanade Concourse. Admission is free!

The entire event begins at 6.30pm, so be there early if you want good spots :) This year we have a whooping 6 a cappella groups from the secondary-school category, 8(!) from the college category, and 2 groups (one of which is Equivox, of course, made up of our very zai seniors ^_^) for the open category. For those who can't make it any earlier, Reso's singing at 7.30pm... the college category opens with us :)



















Come lend us your much appreciated support, scream and cheer and have a rollicking good time, and let your ears have a feast with a dazzling night of a cappella music!

To my dear OOPians: Coming this far hasn't been easy, but you guys have been there to share it every step of the way, and I am ever so proud to be part of you all :) Let's wow them all with an absolutely spectacular performance on the Big Day, yes?

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NDP Preview 06

Feeling decidedly more cheerful, yes.

Friday night and Saturday morning were painfully dreary, sunk in utter sianness, and I'd have moped about at home all day and have it spill over the weekend, had I not met Char for the NDP preview. It wasn't quite so tempting to move out-of-doors at all, with the weather hot and humid, and both of us in a thoroughly unmotivated mood, but I figured that the atmosphere would do us both good :)

It's been ages since I last went for NDP, and this year's significant, because they're gonna tear down and rebuild the monumental stadium that had existed for as long as I remembered. :( National stadium holds a lotta fond memories, for the NDPs I used to go almost bi-annually as a child, and for the annual track-and-field championships during the SN days. Lots of warm fuzzy memories and rousing vibrant atmospheric feel to tap into :)

We decided that since NDP is an event full of pride and hope for the future, we should go along with the spirit. Therefore we shall not proceed inside without first taking Promising Pictures.

Promising young Singaporeans 展向未来

Sorry, couldn't resist *grins*


Love the view =)

Char got Grand Stand tickets, a fact that she didn't let up too quickly. "Must strut down the grand stand", she declares in glee, so we breezed in through the uncrowded west entrance feeling suitably important, occassionally sweeping our hands dramatically to the side to emphasise the fact that we have "so much space... since important people don't have to queue their way in" (Yes, we are very qian bian, but the mock exaggeration and ridiculous dramatisation are irresistably fun. Need to amuse ourselves, no?)

Red-and-white spots.

(Hot and crowded, yes, but we get shade and a lotta space at the Grand Stand *grins*)

To get into the spirit of things we resolved to be totally enthu about anything that comes... that is after all where the fun part of the parade is =) So the clappers were blown (mine was lao hong can, how annoying), the little Singapore flag was waved vigourously and we cheered and kallang-waved and made noises obligingly at the emcees' requests. Sing-along was not quite as friendly a segment, though... We were quite annoyed that the songs this year were relatively obscure ones. Wei, what happened to Jia and Where I Belong and We Will Get There and We are Singapore and Count On Me Singapore? Even favourites like Munneru Valiba and Di Tanjong Katong were left out completely... *grumbles* And I didn't quite catch the theme song of the year either, but we contented ourselves with yoodling cheerfully along to an approximate lyric and tune anyway.

Parachuteer's graceful landing:


Uniformed groups, impressive as always.


Two Chars pose.


"Please rise to sing the national anthem..."


It's been ages sings I last heard these words, and the Majulah Singapura once sung daily in my younger school days take on a much more significant meaning, along with a sudden rush of pride and nostalgia. Am born and bred a Singaporean, and am super proud to be one too =)

Theme of the year glowing in the night


Pretty balloons!


Posing before the end of the parade


Haven't felt so unrestrained and exuberant and cheerfully crappy for the longest time, singing spontaneously at the top of our voices and raising the energy level way up all by ourselves. *thoughtfully* It's so rare nowadays, to be able to act unabashedly, to gush about silly little things and yet appreciate everything that goes on around you with such easy-going gusto. Char's infectious when it comes to things like that, thank goodness for her =)

I shall get myself an old Sing Singapore CD (what's with all these weeeeird new songs they sing nowadays?) one of these days and sing at the top of my voice at home =)

Suddenly she realised her flame was going out, and in no rapid, fierce fizzing either, just an inconspicuous dying, dying, dying glow of embers.

Perhaps she needs the wind to come and stir the dimly-glowing embers, that within her it will crackle and light up and burn as merrily again. Perhaps she just needs a reminding poke, or some tiny splash of fuel.

Perhaps it is just the imagination of a tired mind, where drowsy eyelids shut out the flickering flames that burn with a steady warmth, still. When she awakens from this half-conscious stupor she will see the fire dance upon the fireplace once again, like it had never waned before. Like it will never, ever wane.

It is very silly to have emotions carry you away, lift you up and drop you down, but at least I can sigh with relief and say, thank goodness I feel.

I realised that I miss a lotta people. In all this rush-about I haven't got to see them, and sit down and talk and laugh and connect and be. For a moment tonight I felt displaced, like I'm not supposed to be where I was, and the thought was unsettling.

*thoughtful* I don't know how to end the entry optimistically, but end it I must, for to go on will be too telling, in the half-drowsy state I am in now. There is nothing to guess and nothing to confide, because mixed emotions require neither rationale nor explanation. All they need is catharsis, and with writing I give me space, and a calming sense of release. I wonder, though, if I could discover the same relief if I were to sing, instead.

*sigh*

I really, really wonder.

Don't be so kan cheong can or not, my dear girl? Everything will be all right. Last time and now and next time and everytime.

I seem to be seeking some sort of reassurance, but I need to know that that in itself is not an empty promise of what I can-- and will-- do.

I'm driving myself nuts. Help. I need to be home again and start to pack and organise and sing and feel like I'm putting things into the right places, and work out an inkling of what's in store for the future, so that I don't feel like I'm stumbling over countless stuff that's tumbling my way, threatening to bowl me over like a pin.

Tomorrow--one more day, and I shall be home. May write a long thoughtful entry, coax myself out of this nonsensical panicking, spend time with my family, learn my notes, pack my stuff, sleep, that kinda stuff.

*nod*

Now go and sleep you silly girl.